What are some funny baby sayings?

One funny quote about babies is "“Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess,” by Lemony Snicket in "Horseradish." Another example is "Babies are such a nice way to start people," by Don Herold.

Comedians often have funny quotes and phrases about babies such as "“When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' 'He's two' will do just fine. He's not a cheese," by George Carlin. Humor columnist Dave Berry said this quote about babies: "If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland."

Another quote from a comedian about babies is "Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts," by Tina Fey in her book "Bossypants."

Joan Rivers once said "I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." Jim Gaffigan also has a few quotes about babies including "You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby."